
This is from August 2011.
We didn’t know how bad things were getting yet. We had no idea how horrible they were becoming. We knew we loved each other, but we had no comprehension just how strong that love was. Things fell apart a little over a month after this picture was taken.
Looking back at pictures from our time together, I can now see how the love died from our eyes. I can see how badly I was hurting you, see just how far I was pushing you away. I never realized that the damage I was causing you emotionally and physically was going to push you away to someone else. I never realized you would go looking for what I wasn’t giving you; love and affection.
Although I should have known, shouldn’t I? I mean, afterall, I was doing the exact same thing. I was still holding on to the guy I had been with before you, because with him and I we never actually had a chance to make things work. Even though I had been trying for five years, we never had a chance to let our love grow into something more than a lovesick fantasy. I let him back in my life, as what I believed at first to be just friends. Yet I started to let him get to me emotionally, and that was when things began falling apart.
Every time I would get angry at you, even if it was for the most minuscule of things, I would turn to him. I began to think maybe I rushed out of things with him too quickly, maybe if things weren’t working out with you maybe it would work out with him.
It took almost a year for us to finally fall apart.
Yet that was exactly what we needed.
Now here we are, over two years after we began our long journey together. And after everything we’ve been through, I love you now more than I ever have before. Sometimes things have to fall apart so that better things can fall together, and that’s exactly what happened. A great future with someone never comes with a perfect past, and I believe now that we can put everything behind us and continue growing strong and stronger every single day. In love, in happiness, and ultimately towards a great future together. We had a rocky foundation to start us off, but it’s smooth sailing from here on out babe. I love you. Always, and forever. <3
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